Do you struggle to let yourself feel good and enjoy your life, especially when the world is on fire?

Do you feel guilty for your privilege and wonder who the f am I to get to prioritize my joy and happiness?

Are you often stuck in your head solving problems, even ones that don’t exist yet, instead of enjoying what’s right in front of you?

Are you looking for all the things that are wrong in your life instead of the things that are right?

If you answered yes to any of the above, ooof do I feel you!

What would it be like to practice letting in any amount of joy and pleasure in your life that you can access?

Even with the bed unmade, messy hair, laundry in the floor, dishes in the sink, existential crises and good-hearted intentions abounding

You still get to feel good

That’s the lesson pleasure is here to teach you

If there were a magic pill or secret sauce to make errything in your life feel better, we’re talking work, life, relationships, parenting, confidence, body image, pur...

There is something undeniably magnetic about a woman in her pleasure.

Grounded. Connected. Alive. Radiant. She knows what she wants and who the f*ck she is.

I know this way of living. It’s literally my job. But sometimes, even now, it can feel lightyears away.

Yesterday I had one of those mornings. You know those mornings...

You wake up late and look at your calendar and have no idea how you're going to get through everything on the list. Too much to do, too little time. Behind before you even start.

Often the overwhelm comes not from the actual time it takes to do the things on our list, but from the emotional charge of doing said things. And by often, I mean basically always!

Responding to that one email you haven't responded to because you don't want to confront the feelings of potentially having disappointed someone or yourself.

That's why I like to say that procrastination doesn't really exist...it's an avoidance pattern connected to perfectionism that protects us from the ...

I know it might feel like a weird time to prioritize yourself and sign up for a coaching call.

It totally is. And here’s what I want to remind you of today:

Remember that any response you're having right now is valid.
Remember that it's not selfish to take care of yourself.
Remember that punishing yourself doesn't help anyone.
Remember to be grateful for peace, especially in the face of war.
Remember that it's healthy to turn off the news and go outside.
Remember to take in any goodness you can today.
Remember to help in any way you can.
Remember to tend to your heart.

I’m still offering free coaching calls until next week and there’s no better time to give yourself this gift.

My clients pay thousands of dollars to get access to me but I'm offering up these coaching spots for free because I want you to be able to feel this for yourself.

I'm willing to stand on this proverbial street corner and look stupid to get you to sign up so I can show you just how powerful this work is and how powe...

If it doesn't feel good, what's the point?

What's the point of the job that pays you well if you're too busy to enjoy your life?

What's the point of living in a beautiful place if you're too exhausted to get outside?

What's the point of the relationship, the house, the job, the family of your dreams if you don't know how to take all the goodness and gratitude in and not self-sabotage?

Yes, there are bills to pay and needs to be taken care of

But we’re kidding ourselves and missing out on so much that is possible by thinking the only way to do that is by grinding away at something we don’t even really like.

I genuinely believe the point of life is finding what feels good and following it.

That's how you know you're in alignment.

That's how you know you're on track.

That's how you know you're operating from trust instead of fear.

If things aren't feeling good, where could you move just one degree towards more pleasure?

Orienting towards pleasure doesn't mean your next-level li...

I know you value hard work and respect others that give their all. It’s something you’ve taken pride in and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Here’s where it gets tricky.

Up until this point in your life, the next level of success and achievement has always come when you’ve found that next gear and given just a little more – push a lil harder in the race and you’ll PR, work a little harder on that next project and you’re up for promo.

There comes a time in every high-achieving woman’s life when she realizes that the life she wants simply isn’t possible by working harder.

This is when it’s essential to take a beat and reflect on what you truly want, not what you think you should want or should be doing. Get honest with yourself about why you’re hiding in your work (especially if it’s work that’s not actually aligned with your values) instead of focusing on the things that are truly meaningful – work that matters, alignment with your truth, quality time, living your desires ...

Many of us aren’t taught how to access and listen to our own truth.

We live in a culture where celebrities and experts are revered and we defer our own authority to those who “know best.”

But what if they didn’t actually know best?

What if you always have been and always will be the most knowledgeable person on this planet on YOU? How could you not be?

So the next time you have the urge to ask someone else the answer to a question you could be answering for yourself, why not try asking yourself instead?

Please don't give yourself a hard time if you get stuck or feel kind of awkward.

Connecting in with our own truth is a skill not many of us are taught but it IS a skill we can develop.

Common pitfalls when trying to access our own truth include:

☀️ Expecting an answer immediately

☀️ Expecting an answer in the form of voice or clear Yes/No

☀️ Expecting it to work like it does for a friend or someone else

☀️ Interpreting your own fear/trauma as Truth

We all access our own trut...

I was walking on the beach past a group of older millennials carrying surfboards and heard a woman turn to the man next to her and ask:

"Do you think I'm Type A?"

He hesitated and looked a little uncomfortable

At his unwillingness to answer, she proceeded to say, "You know, it's like a good thing. You're on top of shit and stuff."

I couldn't help but laugh, smile and feel for this woman.

This woman who was me.

I have prided myself on my diligence, responsibility and quality of work for a long time.

I still get judgy when I feel like people aren't getting shit done in the way I would 😂

But there's a difference between being in integrity with your commitments and being ruled by the drive to succeed.

It can be difficult to see that over-achievement and perfectionism are actually trauma responses because they are so celebrated in our society.

The flip side of this pattern is debilitating overwhelm where you actually can’t get much of anything done – if that’s more of where you ar...

There’s so much noise and misinformation around women having it all. Here’s what I believe to be true.

First wave feminists fought for women having it all – the vote, the job, the family, the board seat, the social life.

This myth of having it all, and all being “the picture perfect life” left a lot of women dry, depleted and void of vibrancy.

Because at the end of the day, having it all meant DOING it all, on your own, working all day, child-caring all night, and somehow volunteering in the spaces in between.

I am so grateful to the women who paved the way for me to want more than this.

Because I *do* want it all and I believe you can have it too.

But to me, having it all means having what you truly deeply want.

Not what you think you *should* want
Not what your parents want for you
Not what society tells you to want
Not what your friends want

What YOU want.

Because OF COURSE you get to have what is most meant for you.

It’s outrageous to think you couldn’t.

So yes, I believe y...

What’s the difference between an over-achiever and a high-performer?

This question has been rattling around in my brain and I finally had a chance to sit down and reflect on this today.

Here’s what I came up with:

Over-achievers think if they want something done well, they have to be the ones to do it.
Over-achievers don’t trust themselves, so they force themselves to work instead of trusting their natural ebbs and flows of attention and energy.
Over-achievers work to compensate for a part of them that feels incomplete – if I could just do one more thing, maybe I’ll feel good about myself, maybe I’ll have worth.
Over-achievers are driven by fear – if I don’t do this well, then I won’t be safe.
Over-achievers don’t have a clear sense of what’s important to them, so they often give more of themselves to work then they might actually want to.

High-performers know that they’re actually not the best at everything.
High-performers trust people to do their part, so they can focus on their zone...

We had our final closing call for the 2021 cohort of Radiance Collective just last week and I am so incredibly in awe of the magic that happens in this community.

We don’t heal patriarchy and capitalism on our own.

We can’t heal from hustle culture and proving our worth on our own.

We need women to see us, feel us, hear us and cheer us on when we get scared and want to run back to self-sacrificing and settling for less than we deserve in life.

I know it’s scary to commit. These same women were scared to join such a long container and give up ninety of their precious minutes every week. And guess what?

That resistance transformed into desire 🔥

None of us missed a call that wasn’t already agreed to be taken off the schedule 🤯

And not from an icky bootcamp-y you must show up or else vibe but honestly from desire – from knowing this was a space that we could show up to in all our moods, states of fatigue and glorious celebration.

I want to share some of the shifts that have happene...