Have you ever considered how much you actually like not feeling good?

I know it’s a bizarre question, but trust me it’s one worth investigating.

Humans are neurologically wired to focus on the negative, what's not working, what needs to be fixed (google negativity bias.)⁠ In fact, we spend inordinate amounts of time trying to solve problems that don't even exist!⁠⁠
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This is partly what it is to be human and have this big ‘ole brain that's designed for SURVIVAL (aka problem solving and scanning for threats) vs THRIVING (aka actually enjoying life).⁠
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But this doesn't have to be your reality⁠.
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There are very practical strategies you can use to see the good, feel the good and actually let yourself take in the good.⁠
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Here's what I mean by taking in the good (or rather what I DON'T mean)...⁠
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😱 Do you know someone who is rich but miserable?⁠
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😱 Do you know someone who lives in the most beautiful place on earth but doesn't enjoy it?⁠
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😱 Do you know someone or are you that someone who has everyt...

I got my nails done today.

I flipped through the color samples and chose a bright warm red labeled number 113 that looked like it might be the color I really like at the other salon I usually go to.

The nail tech brought out the bottle that corresponded to the sample I selected and set it down on the counter while she filed and shaped my nails.

While she fixed up my scraggly nails, I looked at the color of the bottle and realized it was more orange than I wanted and likely wasn’t the warm red that I had thought it was.

Then I had to decide if I was going to say something…

Some of you think this is ridiculous and wouldn’t blink an eyelash at sending food back if it wasn’t what you expected or asking for an adjustment to a haircut or other service.

In this situation, she hadn’t even painted my nails yet, it was really NOT a big thing to ask.

Those of you who hesitate…you get it. It’s that pesky people pleasing self-preservation instinct dressed up as not wanting to impose or put a...

Letting yourself be happy is one of the hardest things you’ll do as an adult

Who am I to be happy when the world is falling apart?

Who am I to be happy when there is so much suffering?

Who am I to enjoy what I have when others have so little?

The guilt and shame are toxic

They compound and fester

And they help no one, not you and not anyone

You get to enjoy your life because you do

This is the lesson pleasure is here to teach you

The holy truth is this: when you are filled up your natural generosity can pour forth

Giving to yourself is not selfish, it’s the *only* way you can be generous without over giving and crossing your own boundaries

You get to be resourced, supported and happy AND trust yourself to be kind and generous to others when you feel moved to do so

I dare you to prioritize your joy, pleasure and happiness for one week and see what happens

Are you game?

The Everyday Pleasure Challenge starts next week and it might just be the best thing I’ve ever created!!!...

Do you struggle to let yourself feel good and enjoy your life, especially when the world is on fire?

Do you feel guilty for your privilege and wonder who the f am I to get to prioritize my joy and happiness?

Are you often stuck in your head solving problems, even ones that don’t exist yet, instead of enjoying what’s right in front of you?

Are you looking for all the things that are wrong in your life instead of the things that are right?

If you answered yes to any of the above, ooof do I feel you!

What would it be like to practice letting in any amount of joy and pleasure in your life that you can access?

Even with the bed unmade, messy hair, laundry in the floor, dishes in the sink, existential crises and good-hearted intentions abounding

You still get to feel good

That’s the lesson pleasure is here to teach you

If there were a magic pill or secret sauce to make errything in your life feel better, we’re talking work, life, relationships, parenting, confidence, body image, pur...

There is something undeniably magnetic about a woman in her pleasure.

Grounded. Connected. Alive. Radiant. She knows what she wants and who the f*ck she is.

I know this way of living. It’s literally my job. But sometimes, even now, it can feel lightyears away.

Yesterday I had one of those mornings. You know those mornings...

You wake up late and look at your calendar and have no idea how you're going to get through everything on the list. Too much to do, too little time. Behind before you even start.

Often the overwhelm comes not from the actual time it takes to do the things on our list, but from the emotional charge of doing said things. And by often, I mean basically always!

Responding to that one email you haven't responded to because you don't want to confront the feelings of potentially having disappointed someone or yourself.

That's why I like to say that procrastination doesn't really exist...it's an avoidance pattern connected to perfectionism that protects us from the ...

I know it might feel like a weird time to prioritize yourself and sign up for a coaching call.

It totally is. And here’s what I want to remind you of today:

Remember that any response you're having right now is valid.
Remember that it's not selfish to take care of yourself.
Remember that punishing yourself doesn't help anyone.
Remember to be grateful for peace, especially in the face of war.
Remember that it's healthy to turn off the news and go outside.
Remember to take in any goodness you can today.
Remember to help in any way you can.
Remember to tend to your heart.

I’m still offering free coaching calls until next week and there’s no better time to give yourself this gift.

My clients pay thousands of dollars to get access to me but I'm offering up these coaching spots for free because I want you to be able to feel this for yourself.

I'm willing to stand on this proverbial street corner and look stupid to get you to sign up so I can show you just how powerful this work is and how powe...

If it doesn't feel good, what's the point?

What's the point of the job that pays you well if you're too busy to enjoy your life?

What's the point of living in a beautiful place if you're too exhausted to get outside?

What's the point of the relationship, the house, the job, the family of your dreams if you don't know how to take all the goodness and gratitude in and not self-sabotage?

Yes, there are bills to pay and needs to be taken care of

But we’re kidding ourselves and missing out on so much that is possible by thinking the only way to do that is by grinding away at something we don’t even really like.

I genuinely believe the point of life is finding what feels good and following it.

That's how you know you're in alignment.

That's how you know you're on track.

That's how you know you're operating from trust instead of fear.

If things aren't feeling good, where could you move just one degree towards more pleasure?

Orienting towards pleasure doesn't mean your next-level li...

I know you value hard work and respect others that give their all. It’s something you’ve taken pride in and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Here’s where it gets tricky.

Up until this point in your life, the next level of success and achievement has always come when you’ve found that next gear and given just a little more – push a lil harder in the race and you’ll PR, work a little harder on that next project and you’re up for promo.

There comes a time in every high-achieving woman’s life when she realizes that the life she wants simply isn’t possible by working harder.

This is when it’s essential to take a beat and reflect on what you truly want, not what you think you should want or should be doing. Get honest with yourself about why you’re hiding in your work (especially if it’s work that’s not actually aligned with your values) instead of focusing on the things that are truly meaningful – work that matters, alignment with your truth, quality time, living your desires ...

Many of us aren’t taught how to access and listen to our own truth.

We live in a culture where celebrities and experts are revered and we defer our own authority to those who “know best.”

But what if they didn’t actually know best?

What if you always have been and always will be the most knowledgeable person on this planet on YOU? How could you not be?

So the next time you have the urge to ask someone else the answer to a question you could be answering for yourself, why not try asking yourself instead?

Please don't give yourself a hard time if you get stuck or feel kind of awkward.

Connecting in with our own truth is a skill not many of us are taught but it IS a skill we can develop.

Common pitfalls when trying to access our own truth include:

☀️ Expecting an answer immediately

☀️ Expecting an answer in the form of voice or clear Yes/No

☀️ Expecting it to work like it does for a friend or someone else

☀️ Interpreting your own fear/trauma as Truth

We all access our own trut...

I was walking on the beach past a group of older millennials carrying surfboards and heard a woman turn to the man next to her and ask:

"Do you think I'm Type A?"

He hesitated and looked a little uncomfortable

At his unwillingness to answer, she proceeded to say, "You know, it's like a good thing. You're on top of shit and stuff."

I couldn't help but laugh, smile and feel for this woman.

This woman who was me.

I have prided myself on my diligence, responsibility and quality of work for a long time.

I still get judgy when I feel like people aren't getting shit done in the way I would 😂

But there's a difference between being in integrity with your commitments and being ruled by the drive to succeed.

It can be difficult to see that over-achievement and perfectionism are actually trauma responses because they are so celebrated in our society.

The flip side of this pattern is debilitating overwhelm where you actually can’t get much of anything done – if that’s more of where you ar...