Do you find yourself feeling exhausted and overwhelmed about everything on your plate?
In the spirit of undoing the burnout-inducing patterns of overworking and overgiving, I'm always asking myself how I can do less, while having more fun and creating a bigger impact.
I have a pink post-it on my desk that I look at everyday that asks me how I need to care for myself and how I need to show up for work that day. After I map that out, I ask myself:
How can I make this all feel more fun, safe, and pleasurable?
So many of us overachievers are driven by deep feelings of unworthiness, fear, doubt and complex emotional trauma that drives us to work harder because we learned early on that achievement was a way we could earn love.
It's healing to interrupt this pattern by creating a sense of safety, ease and pleasure as you work.
Curious how this works? Intrigued that I talk about pleasure and burnout in the same sentence?
Join us for the free workshop series Alive Again I’m leading next...
Let my people go surfing is the name of a book by Yvon Chouinard, the founder of Patagonia. It’s also a great summation of my biggest insight from this week!
Monday morning I woke up and found a reminder on my calendar for work I was scheduled to start this week and no part of me felt excited to do it.
I could have forced myself through but thankfully, I had a call with my coach that day and she told me to go surfing instead of working. All of my good-girl hard-working programming wanted to protest and defend why this thing HAD to get done today...but I knew she was right.
Instead, I finished what needed to get done and I went to the beach. I gave myself full permission to be in play instead of work mode and the next day I felt so lit up, energized and full of creative ideas. I was even able to finish the behind the scenes work to get my latest free offering ready for you in record time!
And since I know you’re dying to hear, the idea that came to me was for Alive Again...
As I was strolling on the beach this week, pondering life (as one does), I had an insight that might just be exactly what you need to hear today.
I caught myself wondering how much of the self-care and pleasure practices I do are exactly for me...let me explain.
I was first introduced to mindfulness and meditation through my former employer, Google. I felt super fortunate to take classes like Search Inside Yourself, Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, Managing Your Energy and Emotional Intelligence that were all incredibly helpful on my journey.
Through this education, I learned fundamental skills to help me manage my energy, emotions and mental health. But the thing is...these skills weren’t really intended for me or my own well-being and happiness, they were intended to make me a more effective and productive employee.
Our intentions matter!
Can taking care of your body and emotional health help you be a more successful employee – yes! Should that be your primary...
Is your brain on your team or fighting you every step of the way?
If most of us answer honestly, our brain is definitely not on our side. It’s constantly telling us why we’re not good enough or can’t possibly have the things we desire. Why is that?
Well you see there’s this concept called resistance. You can think of it like a principle of nature – whether it’s resistance in an electrical circuit or friction generated by pushing something heavy –
Resistance is a universal reaction to change
In human beings, resistance can look like avoiding doing the things you know make you feel good, like meditating or exercising, in favor of what is comfortable and known, like perhaps Netflix ;)
Our minds are literally designed to resist change because what is known is always safer than what is new. To our brains, the unknown is always where potential danger lies..
To get your brain on board with your dreams and desires, you have to give your brain a...
I’ve been wanting to share this huge shift in my life but wasn’t sure how so I shared it in our weekly call for The Radiance Collective last week and it sparked so many perspective shifts and amazing conversations that I wanted to share it with you too, so here it goes:
I’m at my heaviest and have never felt more sexy than I do right now
Body image is a huge topic with my clients and we all carry so much shame and conditioning around what we look like and that little number on the scale (which is funny because I don’t have a scale and I’m just guessing that I’m at my heaviest )
Most people think that weight is a key indicator of health and happiness and they couldn’t be more wrong. There’s an entire body of research called Health at Every Size and if you’re baffled by this concept, I encourage you to go look it up, read a book, whatever you do.
I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been and have never felt more sexy. I...
I’m riding high from what’s possible when women gather together with presence and intention to support, witness and lift one another up since we just wrapped up the very first virtual retreat to kick-off The Radiance Collective!
It’s legit life-changing to have spaces like this dedicated to our empowerment and growth and I wanted to let you all know exactly how you can get in one of these containers with me this year.
Pleasure as Medicine
Pleasure as Medicine: From Burnout to Inner Vibrancy in 6 Weeks is my signature group program that introduces you to my foundational philosophy of banishing burnout with pleasure and connects you with a like-minded community of driven women.
Together we’ll energize body, mind & spirit, harness the power of pleasure and release stress, trauma and emotion from our bodies so you can feel vibrant and alive.
The program includes live weekly 90 minute community coaching calls, as well as weekly video modules and guided audio...
Yesterday morning, I stumbled into the kitchen bleary eyed after an extra long sleep – it feels like life these days has been demanding more from me – more sleep, more space, more stretching, more care. Lucien was drinking his coffee and had the inauguration proceedings streaming from his desk in the sun drenched breakfast nook.
I wasn’t really planning to watch, but there they were. I made my morning cacao (yes I drink and eat my chocolate these days ;) and watched as Biden spoke, Garth Brooks took the stage and finally – as this gleaming beacon of light – Amanda Gorman stepped up to the podium.
I was immediately captivated by her presence and her words. Soon after she started speaking I burst out sobbing, releasing god knows what I had been holding on to. I think many of us have been holding our breath for four years and are only now allowing a bit of an exhale.
I stopped watching after she spoke and joined my Wednesday morning womens speaking circle...
Five years ago I had an incredibly powerful experience on my journey to becoming the Queen of my life that I’ve been wanting to share but didn’t know how. I got stuck in perfectionism, in wondering if you would think I was too weird and then I just decided to go for it.
So back in 2016, I was still working at Google while going to grad school on the side.
I was tired and dull. I was lonely and insecure. I was afraid of speaking my truth and tbh didn’t really know what “my truth” was. I was "depressed" (in quotes because I think in grief would've been a more apt diagnosis) according to a counselor I saw a couple times through my employer.
And I was still getting great reviews at work, had a loving partner and amazing friends. Things looked fine, but they weren’t.
You see I knew my dad was going to die that year, maybe not consciously but something in me knew it was going to be an intense year.
So I joined a year-long women's therapy group eager to...
As I sat glued to the news coverage on the coup at our US capitol yesterday, I was reminded of a passage I cited in my master’s thesis from Riane Eisler’s seminal text on patriarchy called The Chalice and the Blade.
As she explains, throughout history humans have cycled between periods of relative peace, freedom and prosperity (which she calls gylany) and periods of war, control and domination (which she calls androcracy – we could also call patriarchy).
Historical patterns show that before a major paradigm and power shift from androcracy to gylany, violence and chaos escalates. What we are witnessing in the United States is as Riane Eisler puts it:
"the final bloodbath of the dying system's violent efforts to maintain its hold...but the death throes of androcracy could also be the birth pangs of gylany and the opening of a door into a new future"
The jig is up. The new power structure prioritizing peace freedom and prosperity for all is forming
We mourn for those...
HAPPY FREAKING NEW YEAR!
Holy F balls WE MADE IT. YOU MADE IT! WE FREAKING DID IT.
On this New Years morn, I'm sitting with the desire of doing more of what lights me up and turns me on in 2021.
What if this was the energy you brought to this month, to this year!?!
Hey look I know it's hard with covid and all. It requires dedication, creativity and support to find joy, turn-on and life right now.
But what if?
Instead of deprivation and restriction we chose permission and joy this new years – cause you know how this resolution thing goes already don't you?
You don't trust yourself to make smart decisions 11 months of the year, so you buckle down for this 1 month, and hope that's going to shift the rest of your life...sorry babe, that's not how transformation happens.
I want you to build the confidence, trust and inner knowing to be able to make empowered decisions all year round – decisions that come from trust and permission, not from fear and control.
Your brain is...