How do I learn to relax?

I was born and raised in stress. Growing up I rarely (never?) had an unscheduled afternoon. There was no such thing as sleeping in and reading for pleasure. So "How do I learn to relax" is a question I return to again and again and will likely continue to for the rest of my life.

Given my upbringing, of course I had a hard time relaxing as I got older and was notoriously a menace on school breaks. I would wake my friends up early and demand we go surfing or do something cause I never learned how to "do nothing" and didn't know how to just be. I *did* know how to procrastinate because getting stuck in avoidance was one way I was able to let myself *not* do anything, even if it wasn't all that restful.

A client of mine is on the precipice of leaving her day job after building her business for several years and is feeling rightly unsure about how she'll manage to relax, even with her new spacious schedule. 

She had a realization that even though she's in her late thirties she's never had an unscheduled month in her entire life! (I'm so excited for her!) And very glad she has my support to navigate this transition.

Whether you're leaving a 9 to 5 or simply trying to deeply rest in your daily life, the biggest internal obstacle we face as women is our own internalized shame, judgement and criticism of being unproductive.

Even if we intellectually celebrate women at ease... (I'm thinking of this black and white photo of women lounging on an inflatable raft eating spaghetti on a lake in Italy and looking fly AF doing it) in practice we come up against our own fear that blocks us from doing what we truly want

Fear that resting means we'll never do anything "productive" ever again

Fear that we'll end up penniless on the street

Fear that we'll squander our life away

Fear that people will judge us for being lazy and entitled

In coaching we acknowledge these fears as valid and offer acceptance and appreciation for their purpose which is in some way to keep us safe ❤️

You'll find that when we do this, these fears are often able to release their grip so we can move forwards with our dreams. 

If you also find it difficult to rest, relax, and do what you truly want to do, I would *love* to support you!

All of my 1:1 clients just renewed so I have just a handful of spots available now.

Book a complimentary call to experience what coaching can do for you ✨

XO Alyssa