Five years ago I had an incredibly powerful experience on my journey to becoming the Queen of my life that I’ve been wanting to share but didn’t know how. I got stuck in perfectionism, in wondering if you would think I was too weird and then I just decided to go for it.
So back in 2016, I was still working at Google while going to grad school on the side.
I was tired and dull. I was lonely and insecure. I was afraid of speaking my truth and tbh didn’t really know what “my truth” was. I was "depressed" (in quotes because I think in grief would've been a more apt diagnosis) according to a counselor I saw a couple times through my employer.
And I was still getting great reviews at work, had a loving partner and amazing friends. Things looked fine, but they weren’t.
You see I knew my dad was going to die that year, maybe not consciously but something in me knew it was going to be an intense year.
So I joined a year-long women's therapy group eager to have all the support and community that could see me through this transition.
In a weekend retreat during our year-long program I experienced a guided imagery journey, a kind of waking dream.
I was lost in the dark, tumbling down waterfalls, assailed by hard objects I couldn't see until I finally washed up bruised bloody and semiconscious in a cave under the waterfall
A healer woman tended to my wounds, dressed me and put me to bed. I woke up to the smell of chicken soup and took my time savoring the nourishment.
I sensed it was time to make my way up the stone stairs at the back of the cave. Clothed in a white robe with a crystal and gold pin on my shoulder and a staff in my hand, I made my way to the lush green hills.
I kept walking up and up until I reached the ridge. The woman who had tended to me gestures over the landscape and says all this is yours.
As she places a gold and crystal crown on my head I feel the weight of responsibility that comes with power. I feel my adult woman self rise to meet this invitation.
Here I sit now, five years later after quitting my job, losing my father, getting engaged, healing a lot of my shit, moving into a house, launching my own coaching business and offering my own year-long women's program.
This is a huge full-circle moment to mark as I fully accept the responsibility of this crown, dare to step into my power more fully to guide other women on this journey, dare to nourish, tend and cheer them the fuck on to their power and sovereignty.
Accepting the crown is a choice – a choice that’s available to all of us – at any time.
It’s a choice that allows you to make meaning of whatever pain, suffering, confusion, doubt, meaninglessness you have felt in your life until this point. It’s a choice that allows you to transform that pain into power and purpose. It’s a choice that opens up an infinite world of possibility for joy, pleasure, aliveness, connection, community and meaning.
The only question is – what are you waiting for?
Listen, I know it’s scary as fuck to own your power and disentangle yourself from patriarchy and achievement. This is my life’s work. I am committed to it, but that doesn’t make it easy.
That’s why I’ve designed The Radiance Collective to be the most supportive and welcoming community dedicated to holding you fiercely accountable to your aliveness and of course – radiance ;)
It doesn’t matter if you have a connection with the archetype of the Queen or just like the sound of The Radiance Collective, hahah, if you’re ready to trust yourself, trust your desires and live your life with more joy, pleasure, connection and confidence, this is for you!
This is a small select group and spots are filling uppp! If you feel a tingle, a flutter, a curiosity about what this could be like, who you would get to be if you decided that 2021 was going to be your year and you were an MF Queen worthy of all her desires, get in touch to book a discovery call – let’s get it!